I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
