The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Ladies don't puke and tell
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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