Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Randomize
