I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
