how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize