Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Randomize
