Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I wish my penis had an off switch
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
