I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
