i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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