It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Randomize
