New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
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