let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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