She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
