I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
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