New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Randomize
