I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Randomize
