I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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