Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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