I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
