at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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