ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Just pee around me
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
