Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Do vagina's smell?
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
