It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
