absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Damn victory sex feels great
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
