Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
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