You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
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