She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
