Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
