I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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