I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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