would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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