Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I've blown a few things in my day
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
i think my cat just said my name.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize