Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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