I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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