i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize