Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
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