I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
