My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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