Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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