it wasn't lemon gatorade
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
