I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Randomize
