So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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