So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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