I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
