just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Randomize
