he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
