I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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