This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Randomize
