Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Randomize