I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
