It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Randomize
